Ooops I did it again..

We all are very aware that Christmas season is already here. All those decors are out on display already. Lights are shimmering-sparkling-aglow.ahaha Colorful surroundings and all the carolers are singing out loud just to receive coins from the people. We must not forget the unforgettable yummy delicious foods and magarang gifts. You know what I mean. ;p Then there is this “simbang-gabi” or '”9-mornings” which mostly Catholic Filipinos are willing to participate. They say it’s a preparation for the coming of the Savior. To be honest, I really think far from those other reason/s. The thing that got my interest: when you complete the “9-mornings” your wish will come……TRUE Hu-waaat! Well, that really got me going. I honestly done/completed once or thrice way back. One thing that I wish then was about my HS crush that we would end up together, the rest were random and common. Other than that, I never really understood it by heart. Total Fail :/

There were questions in my heart that are left unanswered before. Seriously, you don’t go to church and pray on your knees because of the things you wish you’ll have. But a lot. Everything really. This requires a very deep explanation which I think I am not knowledgeable enough but is willing to explain anyway. hehe (if you want to-go-ahead-ask-at your own risk ;p)

Well, I haven’t really mentioned from my past entries that I am Newly-Born-Again-Christian.I found and accepted Jesus as my personal savior. So my “9-mornings” then was a huge fail, personally. But now understanding Christmas on a very different view. With reasons, explanations and deeper thoughts. I feel renewed. I get to see the whole thing in a new perspective. -Being present and aiming for the wish to come true is just shallow.

I am writing this entry because my Aunt said that I should go to 9-mornings to make my wish come true. She wasn’t aware that I have my Jesus with me already. He’s surprising me everyday with different wishes of mine that came true. :D (even-unaware-wishes haha)

I am NEW. Celebrating this Christmas on a different way. :D A treasure/changed within myself. Thankful and so blessed for this year. Though there are reasons also to be sad and be gloom, but as a daughter of God I am capable of moving forward day by day. The one thing that everybody should know by heart- *Christmas is when the time we celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ in the manger. *Christ Jesus at the age of 30 was baptized. *Jesus Christ died at the age of 33 on the cross.*Jesus Christ rose again from the dead. *He saved us humans from the dead. Through Him we’ve come to know that THERE IS ETERNAL LIFE IN HEAVEN AFTER DEATH.

 

Images from web

Just so you know my HS crush is now my boyfriend and we’ve been together for a very long time. He was an instrument of God that I am able to meet Jesus, this very Jesus in my heart. :D I won’t be that sorry that I am not going to 9-mornings starting this year, at least I have the full understanding already about Christmas. :D  The joy of everlasting life in heaven after my stay here on earth. Who wanna join me? You? Oh, I know your hesitations. :D  But God doesn’t want you to be harmed. So, come with me.

PAnic Under Attack

Well, My Markidong’s birthday is this coming Friday. Superrrrrr I don’t know what to do on a tight budget. Fail. huhu Even though he said that he ain’t expecting something from me on that day, ‘cause to him he’s even more happier because we’re together. Whateverrrrr. I still want to do something out-of-nowhere. Help me Lord God. Badly wishing for affordable ideas. hehe

ka_Rocks!

Effort

just when i want to post something on this blog saka naman di gumagana tong utak ko. ito nalang nararamdaman ko ang gagamitin para naman may masabi kahit konti sayang kasi(tumawag lang at narinig boses ng crush hala nawala na sa sarili).

oks din naman pala mag-tagalog ano. di kasi ako mahilig mag-sulat o mag-salita ng tagaligs hihihi xenxa nah nirerespeto ko naman ang ating sariling wika kaya lang para bang natatakot ako na baka mali.mali..aahh bahala kayo...eh siguro nagsimula ito nung nasa grade school pa ako..lagi kasi maliit lang ang grades ko sa Filipino subject at pinapagalitan ako ng aking mapang.bugbog na nanay(ng pagmamahal yan)hihihi kaya heto si kara laging utal magsalita ng tagalog at malabo magsulat ng tagalog..(kala naman nito talagang marunong mag-english..eh talagang mahina ako nito pake nyo!)..kaya hayan na.trauma ba...tsaka pag.pupunta kami sa bahay nila hana dyos ko para bang torture moments sa akin pag.nandyan mommy nya kasi naman po tagalog sila magsalita.. aba ako lang ang taong kinakapos ng tagalog sa bansang ito...hahaha kawawa naman tong sitwasyon ko at sa pag.bisita ko sa ibang blogs aba tulo laway ko sa kanila. marunong ang mga taong to mag.tagalog( dapat ba akong mamangha talaga?..haha). ako na talagang pinaka.pasaway na Pilipino sa balat ng saging..kainis. kaya dito ko sisimulan sa pag.tahas ng aking sarili sa pagsulat gamit ang salitang tagalog. oks ba yun?

siguro nagtataka kayo ba't hindi ako marunong ano,...pwes higupin nyo to..Oo sa isla ng mindanao ako nakatira at hindi salitang tagalog ang gamit namin dito,..hindi naman talaga ako bobong bis.dak (-BISayang DAKo-) pero sige hinahamon ko ang aking sarili sa pagtatagalog. (Dyos ko kakahiya naman)..At eto pah, talaga naman nakakamangha ang ating pambansang wika kasi para sa 'kin mas malalim ang mga kahulugan o gustong ipinapahiwatig ng salitang tagalog..pero depende din naman sa pag.gamit. ewan ko...(huwag naah bawal sa 'kin mag-isip)
sana maintindihan nyo tong isinulat ko...kung natakot ko man kayo o napatawa. ewan ko kung pwede kong ipagmalaki sa sarili ko sa nagawa ko sa inyong mga hindi masyadong malugod na bumabasa ng blog na ito.. hihihi pero di bale ibubuhos ko lahat ng aking talino at lakas mapabuti lang ang kalunos.lunos na sitwasyon ko...hahaha

sige hanggang sa muli kong pag.sulat (aba kapal..hihihi)

bianca..peace

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The above entry was written 16 February 2007 on this same blog. Memories while still starting this crazy-little-thing-called-BLOG. True love. hehe

 

<3

Ka-ROcks!

Oooooh ;p

 

Ameeyziiiiiiing!

I just can’t get owverrrrr with this movie. Grabeh it’s just like what I imagined while I was reading the book. Bow down to the people behind this film. :D Kristen and Robert now really have that chemistry onscreen. I think it helped a lot now that they are a real couple. Superrrbbbb.

Well, I wasn’t really planning to watch the movie when I was in Dumaguete City 2 days ago. But it was a gift from a friend that I couldn’t refuse. haha I can say this is the movie of the year.  I just couldn’t explain it thoroughly. To be honest, to me this movie is the best among the Twilight Saga. So hopefully the 2nd part of Breaking Dawn will take over this one.  I love every second of it. I’ll be watching this over and over again :)

Images from web

Bad trip nga lang while watching the movie, there were parts that I would really want to cryyyy but it was awkward because I’m with a friend. #badly-wishing-I-watched-it-with-my-boyfriend :’(

Found the official soundtrack of the movie. “It Will Rain” by Bruno Mars. Here’s a video with lyrics. Enjoy!

Another Month ;p

 Happy Monthsarry <3

Another month being together. :D I am not a fan really of keeping tracks on “special days” such as this. But, I couldn’t help it. I tried to avoid making fuss out of it before. I was just afraid I might disappoint myself because I was thinking maybe my partner wouldn’t care also. I was surprised because he’s the one who makes efforts about it. This just made me realized that our relationship is special, might as well celebrate it in a humble way.

The picture above was taken almost 5years ago. At our friend’s home. The only picture we have that looks like we’re a couple. haha ;D  To us, everyday is like  Valentine’s day. I think all couples should feel that way (even during times of trial). The past few nights before I sleep, memories came rushing back to me when we were still in high school. We were classmates then, and from the moment I saw him - I fell in love. It was love-at-first-sight and he felt the same way too. But we were young and I challenged myself to avoid relationships and I won. So what did I do to enjoy my-little-puppy-love-while-staying-single? (positive way lang ;p)

 

• I studied hard for myself and family and to impress him.
• I never told him I like him too. He might think I’m easy.
• I was strict. So, no boys ever gets near me even him. So he won’t think I’m a flirt and just plain fair.
• Boys whom I can feel that’s treating me differently because he might have liked me, are then avoided.
• Boys who courted me was marked “X” immediately on their forehead. I have so much respect for myself and my feelings and I don’t collect and select. I don’t want to take advantage, so as early as possible I tell them the truth that my heart is already set to someone else.
• I kept my feelings for him to myself. I still need to grow up and mature, I surely think he does too.
• My past time then is to stare at him and making sure I wouldn’t get caught. haha Just being observant and it was fun.
• I discovered: When I feel cold, uneasy, my heart would beat faster, shortness of breath, that something ain’t right about me, I would know right then that he is in the area close to me, or walking towards each other at the hallway. Without seeing him first, he was the reason for it. And it never failed me. It’s like I have a radar. haha  A-HAPPY-JUST-ME-TIME

I enjoyed every bit of it in high school. Middle year in HS he went to other place to study. After HS, we made it as a couple-maybe because I was afraid that he might leave again. But, it failed. My heart was badly broken. I believed it was a rush. We haven’t matured enough yet. I had friends who were great support system and recovered. Then almost 5 years ago the right time came again for us. Gave it a-new fresh start. And now we’re still here, celebrate seconds of togetherness. I am thankful about everything. To him, to us, to the One who made all these possible. I am now with my first love / only-boyfriend-since-birth. Through good times and bad times. We’ll be together. I love you Mr. John Mark C. Refugio / the-best-boyfriend-everrrr. :D

P.S.

I seriously advice high-school STUDENTS to DO the same thing as what I did. A little patience, give respect to yourself. It’s hard but you’ll get over it. Don’t rush things. Enjoy being young, not worrying about immature relationship or being a teen parent. :D

Love,

Ate Kara #a-very-happy-girlfriend

I will post later regarding Breaking Dawn Part1 movie. ;p

I was thinking…

  Blue eyes… yikes sooo cute! haha

 

  I should visit Vietnam for this.

  Should go to Germany for this.

  Should travel High Profile sometimes. haha That’s Benz my friend.

  China. I will conquer this challenge someday.

  Should build it just like this.

  Perfect for scribbling, so I won’t have to nag. haha

  Must hold the moon for awhile.

  Walkable-Roller-Coaster  is a thing to try.

 Images from http://thefancy.com

To think about these, are just simple things. But comes with so much complications. ;p

Must work hard and pray hard. <3

Valentine on a November <3

 

I know Valentine’s Day is still months away. But with all this feeling that I’m feeling right now just don’t fall for the month of November. ;) Just the feeling of being in love and being loved back. No words could ever define such. haha

I’m happy where we are right now. We’re in the middle of everything. But between us, there is God, family,and friends. Couple of nights ago, it’s like I’ve been walking on cloud9. haha 

It’s always like the first time we’ve seen each other. It's been a decade ago and it feels just like yesterday lang (;

I love you MR. JOHN MARK C. REFUGIO!!!!!! (until forever lang ha huwag na sumobra.hehe)

Future ?

 

To me this is such an inspirational song. I love it.

Whatever happens in the fututre, eh?

Just enjoy every minute of it.<3

Life is beautiful.

Ayan! Positive lang.

haha I am just advicing to myself. ;p

Couples <3

Say that I’m a stalker. But I’m a stalker for love. Couples are a bit more open nowadays with regards to their love stories. I love to read their statuses or comments on social networks. Which is the most famous way to catch the eyes of the public. The reasons could be as following:

• They just want to know the world about their love
• They want to inspire others, but I have a strong feeling they just want to
• Make others jealous with what they have. lol (coz I feel that way)

 

Image from web

Of course I agree with the first one, unless it’s a forbidden love isn’t it. Saying “I love you” while the rest of the world would know. Is a feeling of being proud that you are with someone you really care  and want to spend the rest of your life with that person. Or to make the rest know you’re already taken. Well, I totally think it’s cute. Secondly, inspiring love stories really empowers other people. Gives hope for the hopeless romantic ones. Thirdly, yes for the bitter people who doesn’t want couples to be together and prove them all wrong. :D

This is what’s happening in this world right now. There’s no sense of boundaries. I’ve seen couples started this way, never mind the people around them just go with their feelings and throw it to the world. The world never minds about it.  When they are happy with what’s going on in their relationship they just keep bombarding the world about it. But once there is something wrong they kept it silent to let the people know that they’re perfect with what they have. And then end up separated. I plea to them to be real. If they wanted to make things in public then go all the way. Be it a bad day or a bad conversation. People like me who watch you guys get sad. Because once I would know a couple then I see what they’ve gone through. I start to look up to them and see myself that it could happen to me too. But heartaches and hearts broken into pieces aren’t the things I want for me.(I may have wronged myself because of this habit but this is me.) Well mostly they go for movies, me likey real people. ;p

I like it when they learn to keep things in private and start sharing only when they’re asked to. To me it’s extra special. The things you share events (sad,happy, etc.) that you hold dearly is out in the public’s eyes. You get to be scared because of this action. others will criticized and give their opinions but in the end what matters most is you and your partner.

Everyone have their own love stories, created in a most unique way as possible. But what about others who find themselves in a limbo of being single?(I’m not saying that it’s no fun but two is better than one, isn’t it?) :D Inspiration what keeps us going. So in believing that love do truly exist, brightens up minds and hearts. God is love, you believe that each person in a relationship is God’s given gift for each other. Keeping hopes of finding true love and to know it’s just in the horizon.

And so I still wonder when will I stop this kind of nosy business? hehe I will someday. <3

A Lovely Day even when it’s raining :D

 

 

 

Images from web

 

Weather gives us impact or influence on how to start our day right. :D We couldn’t deny that it also affects our emotions.

This morning it rained. I really look forward to sunny everyday because my Mark would have to travel with his motorbike going to work. I don’t want him to get soaked wet and slowing him down to come to me. I want extra time to spend with him in the morning. Gloomy/rainy sky just makes me feel a bit extra emotional. It’s like the end of the world for me. I was born on the month of March. I am proud to be born on summer season.So you could imagine me loving the Sun, beach, flowers, anything associated with summer. They just lift my soul to heaven. I could spend a whole day under the sun or the umbrella for that matter. I love the idea of sweet sweat #fortherecord heheh and ice creams yummmm.I don’t know why but anything special happens in my life falls on summer dayssss .. I’m just lucky enough I have someone that brings forth the sun and turn my mood to hyper hip mode and turn my sad face into a smile even when it’s raining. :DDD Everyday is such a lovely day. <3 

 

How about you? :D

Joy = madness

A month ago, I went to my HS Principal’s office because I needed my Form137 and a certificate to prove that I really graduated in that school. The secretary told me that it will take longer. It was okay, usually it takes 1-2weeks waiting for the documents to be ready. I went back there exactly 2weeks after,just to make sure all things are ready but I failed. The secretary said it wasn’t finished yet. So okay,I get it. I told her that I badly needed it. Like superrrr BAADDDD. It’s like I’ve gone to the office almost every other day to check the progress and still nothing. Then one day, she said that it’s all done but needed the Treasurer’s signature. But unfortunately the treasurer went out-of-town, then the semestral break came and so expectedly that the staffs especially that secretary would be gone somewhere. Then Halloween. Then 2nd semester started, she said the treasurer isn’t signing any papers, so dead-end again. I personally went to the Treasurer’s Office to confront my aunt/treasurer to sign my papers. Damn! I got super excited and so relieved.Then the paper’s got signed by the School Registrar. So it’s finally overrrrr.

I thought so too. When I went to Pagadian City to submit my authenticated papers last FRIDAY. But unfortunately on the certificate written there I graduted S.Y.2008-2009. Hellooo? I smell Disasterrrrr. I graduated HS S.Y.2004-2005, so it’s impossible that they will honor my papers. Good thing that lady said just to mail the certificate back to DepEd Pagadian office, once it’s okay. Making sure to hurry because all the staff will be going to Zamboanga City for a week long event.  So I texted the secretary ahead to redo my certificate and find ways to get it all ready once I get back to Dipolog City. When I had it in my hands the signature wasn’t from the Principal herself. The secretary said it was the OIC who signed because the principal was in a seminar. But the DFA won’t honor such thing. Failed! So I told her on monday I have to have it!

What happened this morning? I texted her early that I will get the certificate. She texted back that her class is on 9-10am. WTF! she really is saying I gotta wait? Then I went there at the office 11am. But she said she will look for a computer cafe to print out my paper and WAIT. I’m soooooo pisssed off. It’s 12nn, I texted her if she is still having her lunch, because I am after for the cut-off time to deliver a mail to Pagadian City. She texted back: No, I am printing your paper at my own expense. Wow! namaaaannnn. Hanep ka rin anoh?

Of course. Do you think it should be mine? For handing me the certificate that I end up the one should go to the principal to have her sign it and to have it dry-sealed too. Wow! You really got into my nerves. Me doing your job. So until now it’s not yet finished because the principal wasn’t around in the school campus this afternoon also the School Registrar. So I will go back there again tomorrow. Hope it will all be over. Then, I’ll bury them in my darkest dark memory.I didn't even got a SORRY from you secretary, for all the delays and troubles you've caused me. Damned girl!
Please secretaries from all over the world do your job well.      

SECRETARY

Kara Vs. Zombies

Until when shall I pay for the ”debt of gratitude" ? I think I’ve been paying for it. And I just can’t take it while they’re taking advantage of me. Ok, I was hurt when that lady blurted sharp words over the phone like I’m somebody’s bitch. Because I’M NOT. And I can’t just let it pass. Yes, past is past. All that I want is to let those zombies realized that they should STOP doing their usual business, bringing emotions and characteristics of other people down and start treating them with respect. Stop eating others' brains!!

I think I had enough. If only papa is around he would understand my situation, unlike mama. Should I wipe their shits off their asses? Should it be enough to pay for it? I did finished school. I passed the board exams. I had series of jobs. I do have a boyfriend (which they see as a negative thing) and getting married is not even our main priority. This doesn’t mean having a small brain. I just don’t want to go there and pretend while facing the zombies. I don’t want to see that B*tchvian. Lola is A-okay, of course, nothing’s wrong with our relationship.It’s just we don’t see each other. That’s all, and other apos don’t see her as well but that’s normal. Yeah yeah, it might be too late or whatever. Look, the most important person, most valued person in my life is my papa. He’s gone now and I don’t see anybody who fits in his shoes to replace him in my life. I look up to him. Yeah the zombies, they’re my relatives but I don’t want to poison my brain again. I owe much wisdom from my papa. I could see clearly all their dirty tricks. Clearly my mother is one of them so she sees me now as a villain for not coming with her in visiting those zombies. I don’t want them to eat my brain.

 

 

The uber-zombified person is B*tchvian. She has the thing called mind-control. She’s a powerful brain-washer and puts in your mind that when you DON’T follow everything she says, she’ll make sure you’ll lick the fire of hell. Well I just proved to you my dear reader I overcame the situation and I still have my brain. I’m enjoying my  life just staying away from her.

And I’d like you to meet the other sister, an uberly-zombified person Nunchess.This, my friend is the kind of zombie at first glance she would actually look like an angel. But once you know her, she slowly add seasonings to your brain, cook it then eat it. 

I had enough feeding them with energy and all my effort. I  think they ate a small part of my brain long time ago. So I needed to grew them back!!!! Grrrrrr Hearing them talking shits you don’t want to know and yet you will know because they’re talking about it, it’s like pouring gas to myself and light myself on fire. They’re back-biters, they have all the negativity in this world. And passing their unique habit to the next generation? I just had to end it. I’m tired staring up to them. My eyes are all burnt from all madness they’re doing. Just because of that “debt-of-gratitude” I have to go through all the darkness AGAIN?  All I have to do now is to stay away from the zombies. I’m still weak and facing them is not my dream yet. I know there’ll be issues again in the future and might involved my relationship with my boyfriend and my personal relationship with The Creator. I just have to be ready.

If ever I went there. What could have happen? It’ll be awkwaaaaaaard. It wouldn’t be the same as before. It’s too painful to be forgotten soon. I didn’t even received or heard an apology. So be it. I know there are people who support me in this battle and I have the most powerful MAN in my heart. To forget is to stay away and not be reminded always of the situation.

Zombieeees!!!!! Bring it on.

Wohoohooho…

Waaaaah got stung by a bee this morning on my finger. :c Bees are like swarming all over our house. Especially in the evening when all the lights are on. There’s so many of them. I was thinking that I’ll just fry them and eat them. They’re so annoying. And each week there’ll be like 1 to 2 victims be stung by ‘em. Haayy. Super painful and gosh when it swells, and the itchiness and the bruise when it’s all over. Wish I could make money from them, like all those honey and by cooking them ofcourse. (bitter)

I want to share a place where you could actually spend time with the bees. But not in our home, definitely. It’s called Bohol Bee Farm. Found in Panglao Island, Bohol, Philippines. It was way back 2009. I was with my boyfriend. He was based in Tagbilaran, Bohol at that time. I had a chance to visit him and brought me to places that are famous. So one was this bee farm. At first I got scared, first thing that cross my mind was ‘will they attack when they’ll see such an intruder?’ But out of curiosity and might as well enjoy the travel and all the sceneries going there, so we hit off. We went there by a motorcycle. Traveling in the afternoon, the sun fried our precious skin. The place is like half to an hour travel from Tagbilaran City, depends on the mode of transportation by the way. So when we got there you could see the receiving area and all those souvenir items sold there. The receptionist greeted us and informed us that we were late for the tour so we should wait for 20 minutes ‘till the first batch will be finish. We waited there and took pictures. Below are pictures I got from the internet. I don’t have the photos we actually took because of some matters.hehe ( I only sneaked from my parents just to be in this island, that’s why I didn’t have copies for discreet purposes. ;p)

 

    

 

 

That time it was only Php20.00 per head to avail the tour around the vicinity and as mentioned it will take 20 minutes. My boyfriend and I thought it will be just the two of us for the next batch but then just minutes after there are tourists arrived and we’re now a crowd. We get to wear native hats along the tour. The tourist guide showed us their garden of some vegetables that you find only on cooking shows. Well they grow them there for their very own restaurant which serve only organic food. Might be mouth watering on what they can be in the dishes (for the fanatics of the green team, or it might change my perception about them once tasted.hahaha). The tour itself wasn’t boring, there’s interaction among the tourists, the guide would raise questions and me and my boyfriend would just stare at each other being so clueless and shy because we’re like the youngest among the group. ;p We just let the “old ones” answer.hahah So we finally arrived to the “thing” which made the place famous. The BEES.

 

 

   

 

They were in cages. Yehey! Goodness. So they won’t sting us, that’s a relief. Well they were kept there so the honeys can be collected from those screens or something. Sorry for the very poor information.heheh Tourists can hold those screens filled with bees and take some pictures. Just like that in the picture, I think he’s a tourist guide or something.heheh They aren’t scary to look at but expect the Buzzzzzzzing sound they create. ;)  In the area they have villas and restaurant and a pool quite big which is by the way located in the center of the restaurant itself. Quite amazing. I could remember there was also a play area such as darts and table tennis. Actually the place is just located along the beach. So you could see long stretch of cool blue water. Just staring at the scene makes you relax. There was also an area where tourists could observe creative workers making crafts that are sold in their souvenir store. One that caught our attention was their ice cream station. Yummmm! But reading through the labels of flavors they were like made from kalamunggay and other leafy vegetables I couldn’t even remember the names.hahaha I’m not a fan of those greeny guys so I kind of backed off. But they’re so interesting to look at and might try one. So I ordered scoops of avocado flavored icecream. Yehey! Tasted good. hahaha Yeah, I know what’s in your mind, it’s a fruit. I know right? Because I got so curious and I don’t want to poison myself so an avocado is a good idea.hahahah The photo below is the kind of ice cream they serve there.  Got from the internet. Not mine. Actually all the photos aren’t mine, okay…

  

 

Might visit there again in the future. Bringing my very own Queen Bee.hahaha Or I’ll ask something about doing THE BEE BUSINESS. Kicking off. For now I have to deal with my stinging bees here. Sigh.

Goodness.

I finally changed skin.hahah after gory hours of learning how to do it. Before I have my friend who’s good at this, so I usually just ask her politely to change anything regarding the templates of my blog and all. Now I guess it’s time that I should be doing it. But I admit, I still don’t know how to sort the things such as the archives  and the about me corners. Forgive me on that. I have to wait for the next kick of adrenaline and patience so I could get to learn it. But as of now I’m happeee. :) Good job. Yeah.heheh

The thing that’s behind some entries that doesn’t have titles because my previous skin would never show it. So I just start on my scribbling anyway.tsk Now I can and I will have titles for my entryyyy. :p  Ooooh change, I’ve been so hungry for you.heheh

I wonder if my friend still visits this site. Well, she’s the only entity who knew about this next to me. And I even wonder if others would get to read any of these stuff I wrote. Well, in the first place it wasn’t really my intention that you know, I’d be like those well known human beings who are constantly updating and posting photos in everyday of their lives and fans follow them. Well here is likely private. But it’s really been private and I guess it’s safe to say that I can do anything with this and nobody will criticize but ME. ;p

Yes! Finally a photo. I can see my picture here.haha That’s happiness.

I guess.

 

I guess, we’ll be seeing each other more in the future. Ohhhh. hehe We’ll be spending online for the rest of my daysssss. heheh. Nothing much going on. I miss watching NBA much. Season hasn’t started yet. And news yesterday they’ll be canceling the first 2 weeks of pre season games. How sad. But then again, it’s not like it’s gone forever.  Soooooper excited about that. :p Anyhow, I’m happy that I can post crazy thoughts as often now and hopefully will post photos too. I haven’t done that in years. I also have to learn how to change styles… But I really have a feeling of home here in blogger.

 

Welcome to my home… :) which is under the oil spill by the way.haha 

Unlimited!

I just want to share something that is worth a good-short-laugh.:)

My boyfriend and I really love each other in every way. Like me, I am really afraid to offend him in anyway. So if there is a circumstance that I am offended, I just smile back at him. '______' Well, a sarcastic smile to be more specific. But you know, my boyfriend is good in ignoring the signs. Though you know it's more easy to just confront him about it, and address the situation. But like any other girls, it is always the long process.:p hahaha (admit it, you!) He knows that it's something that I couldn't agree and he still show it or do it. I just do my best to ignore or just make face at him. And then he would asks me if my love for him decreased, and I would smile and answer 'yes, definitely.'as a joke. And he would laugh at me and then tease me or something. And I'll smile with no traces of disappointment. I mean littlest things he does for me will make me happy or pinch my heart at the same time. But at the end of the day it's still him I want to be with for the rest of my life.

Unlimited love <3

what was high school like?


personally, it really changed my outlook in life. i had to go down to see where should i stand in life, i learned to value people, i learned that i should surround myself with happy people 'cause i'm quiet and shy. i have to do my best in class not because i know i can but not to embarrass myself to my crush. i'm not always the first when it comes to fashion or one of the best looking girls in high school, but that was it... molding myself to the person i am now.

all i wanted before high school class started are friends, new set of classmates for sure. you know what? it has been 10 years since we all knew each other but until now it just feels like we're freshmen over and over again every time we all meet up .

like i said i am shy and reserved. so i was fond of listening to people and looking observing on things around me. so much going on in my mind. searching for answers to questions about life. is it found through people around you? on how much influences they've rub off unto you. while thinking how much money do i have in my pocket to buy snacks and for fare.

it was in high school i fell in love with books and writing. it was when my mind was talking to myself so loud i wish others could hear 'em but with no guts, yes they we're left unsaid and forgotten.

it was in high school that i started to appreciate people of different gender and respected them in their own senses. it was in high school i fell in love, with no one to everrr talked to because i was sooo sure i could handle it myself when in fact i was at my breaking point. i was afraid to share my emotions and heartaches because they might just laugh about it, and i was damn sure they are also darn busy with their own love problems that mine wouldn't be much of an interest.

you see in high school, all i could firmly and clearly remember was my experience being in love. it wasn't the exams or the oral recitations. yes, although you can share it to others or your hs friends and laugh about it. but being in love in high school taught me to be human.

human, in a way that all my senses are at it's peak. it's like my surviving skills we're tested. well, as i said all i wanted was to gain friends. oh yes, i did gained, a lot in fact. but few we're worthy.

1st day.

when i was searching for a sit in a crowded room full of yagits ( means kids in a local dialect) my peripheral vision caught a particular person sitting at the back as i was walking. i was pretty sure we hadn't been introduced but a name just flash in my mind that says john mark. it's like those news channels on the bottom part where you'll be able to read the headlines. it's just there. well i haven't confirmed it yet, of course i was shy. but i couldn't stop myself from glancing once in a while to that dark handsome guy that's chatting with his friends and keeps laughing with them. i just had a feeling that i knew him. that somewhat we'll be dealing much in the future.

that night. a phone call, strange it was a man's voice, asking if we have assignments for tomorrow. it was him. you know what? i happen to know i have a heart that would jump out of my system then i couldn't breathe, and i was getting cold. i couldn't explain it. and how the hell did he have my number when i only give to the girls. i answered back that we don't have any-end of conversation. the next day i knew why he has my number because unknowingly, a girl really asked for my number thinking it was really her cellphone she was using but then it was his. so there, a coincidence?

i always thought that classes starts at 6.30am so by 6.15 i have to leave my house. so when i arrive, the spectacular sunlight making it's way through the branches and leaves of the trees surrounding the campus and the perfectly green grass fields and the fogs that early morning coldness creates welcomed me. as i sat on one of the benches near my room which still wasn't open because there was still no one around as early as i was. so there waiting for more high school students to arrive then him, mark would be there sits near me but wouldn't say a word. it would only be minutes or sometimes mark and i would almost always get there at the same time. well i didn't knew then he just lives near the school,so no wonder he would get there early.

i wasn't paying attention to my looks back then. all i know is that i don't look like a witch, just a plain school girl. i'm not the kind who always have powders, combs, and colognes in their pockets. i don't really care. i just want to learn. carefree. but sometimes i get to be conscious, and compared myself with those really beautiful and classy people. i had to learn myself. the whole structure of me, what i was built. then i knew each and every one are not alike, i deserved to love me.

i wasn't struggling for good grades because i just knew i can pass because i believe
in what i can do. and i've proved it. i was gaining a little bit of independence along the way.

but the real battle was always about love. finding that one person that would truly love me back. was never a priority. but somehow i know it will come but then again i never expected that it would hit me hard early in high school. and honestly i never had a boyfriend back then. that guy i was talking about was and is the first guy that i truly love and got my heart broken.

but before it all ended up in tragedy. i have cute stories to share. he was the first guy i ever had a date with. actually a friend sort of paid for it, and i swear it was only for 5 pesos date. it was intramural week so there was blind date booth. well i told only a girl friend that i have a huge crush on him but never really actually would want to go ahead for that game. so there we were in that room blind folded, i was peeping through it. there were people in the room watching us, which was also distracting. that was when we first held hand. and i was sweating like a pig.

my reflexes wouldn't fail me. every time i would move my head it would only point to him and i just stare at him. i couldn't perfectly describe the feeling of it but i was trying my best to get to know him even without asking him personally (hahaha i was just afraid). i don't usually asked around but people talk. i just listen. so i knew then that he is of different faith than mine. but i made my decision even before i knew it, that i would gladly change my religion for the person that i love. whoah! i had no idea.

i would look at him and yes he would complete my day. but i was pushing my feelings away. that he will just hurt me in the end. and yes, i wasn't wrong. i found out one day he had a girlfriend and on that day i was scheduled to go to the dentist have my tooth extracted. and after that first extraction my doctor asked if i would want the other tooth also be pulled. and so i decided to go for it. the pain isn't too bad to handle after all but the one in my heart was unbearable. i have to move on. i see him every day, but i have to just look somewhere else. i even saw them together, how i wish i would just rip them off. but ofcourse i was just a nobody. he was a soccer player so the team travel much. i entertained guys who said they liked me. i get to talk to them. but i realized why is it i can't do these things with him. one of his team mate had a crush on me. so that guy keeps calling me every night. the team was away and he might have heard that the other guy was courting me. while i was in my bed. scribbling notes from my mind. i drew a cartoon that a girl in her room is thinking that her crush would call him. and immediately after that my phone rang, i answered and it was him on the other line. he was asking if i liked him but i was afraid to say yes, for a reason that he happens to have a girlfriend. so sad.

fast forward 10 years later.

we've moved on. i finished school, passed the boeard exam. i'm in a relationship now. a serious one. mature one. my partner is the best. he makes me laugh. who's always there for me. he takes care of us. he has a job. we almost agree and disagree at times. we're both happy. i couldn't ask for more. his name is john mark. yes it was him 10 years ago. see, i was pretty sure we'll end up together. <3 prayers are answered. just have faith. and now i'm still crazy in love with him, actually he feels the same. and i've changed my faith, i'm now a christian and i'm glad we have found the director of our lives, God. who is the center of our relationship. we both go to church together, which makes it even great. :)

we have history that we can share together and just laugh about it. through everything we learned to value people and ourselves, our emotions, i learned many things. i know that i am living a more meaningful life. we're both looking forward to a good future together an our very own family. :)

So thank you high school for everything. life's lesson learned from scratch. <3

Do What You Want!


Well, I've been sitting in front of this computer and yet it seems that my daily routine is what exactly really happens. I have the smallest online world everrrrr.

It's not that it's a big thing or something but you know, picturing others' that have so many connections to the outside of their trusted circle. I'm just wondering how did they able to cope up with it?

People now a days are just constantly communicating. Do they even have time to miss each other?

My boyfriend and me used to be like that but not in social networking sites that we should be greeting each other with our good mornings and all. That other people should notice. Or saying I love You to the public. But really, is there a need to do all the cheesy stuff out into the open?

Instead of that, aren't we supposed to just talk sense of every topic we should be posting?

Da When?

 

When I was in Cagayan de Oro for job training, I lived at my aunt's house. She was surprised that I and my cousin Andrew were there. I told her my purpose and she welcomed us in her home. She then asked why I was still here in the Philippines. She thought I was already in America. But I wasn't because I still have to accomplish some major requirements for it, including 2 years' experience in the hospital. I didn't know then that one of her daughters is a nurse in Saudi Arabia, who also got married to a doctor there who holds a higher position in the hospital she is working. Now, my aunt told her my situation that I am working in a car company nowhere near being a nurse. So then she offered me an offer of a lifetime. To work there, with her help. Voila! I am now sorting out my papers for me to work there too. (I am smiling on this part :DDD) Truly who wouldn't be marvelled about it? Being a nurse and work at the rate your supposed be paid, well that is one in a million situation.

I tried to be discreet of anything, regarding travels, papers that I'm working on. And trusts few friends to share the real score and also are helping me. I just want that when everything is ready, that the only thing left to do is to fly, that is when I truly want the facts to really sink within me. And then I can share the whole story to others.

But as of the moment, I wish to shut our mouths about it. But, now things are almost out in the open so I guess just let it be. Hopefully, God willing that I'll be able to get over the hardship, money matters, physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and all wally wally needed just for me to be ready with no hindrances within me when I fly and work.

 

Whew.. it's really not easy.

 

 

Dai and Dong = Belle and Pit,

Dai and Dong = Belle and Pit,

Finally a wish came true. My boyfriend and I used to call each other Dai and Dong. We avoid being too corny and cheesy when it comes to terms of endearment. On Dai and Dong, it's not too embarrassing to call around people. I know it's not too sweet, it even sounded like we're yaya and hardinero nang isang mansyon lang naman J. Well, it sounded more like humility and respect rather than sugary.

Coolness as it sense. But that's how it defines us. Weeks ago we decided to push to try different name calling because another couple whom is close to us is using the same names. And to be honest we're not in the position to change. But I'm just too pissed off by them and even my boyfriend says so. Yesterday we brainstormed about it for hours we couldn't think of any. Until we arrived to each house and started texting, he came to cross saying I'm "belbel" (because I do happen to have slightly big belly :DDD). I thought of calling him Pete/Pit. Pete stands for feet, which he loves to scratch and could also be spelled as Pit, because of armpit I do happen to love smelling that part of his bodyJ.

Yeah, I know what you're thinking too disgusting. Exactly, that's the point. Belle and Pete, really sounds like too happy and in love couple, right? :DDDD But not disgusting, it will be like this for a week lang naman. It's official; we're now Belle and Pete/Pit.

Blissful. It even makes me shed a tear. Lol :DDD

Who?

I've been with my friends for a decade already. Since high school through college days. I never really imagined that we would stick to each other like this. Somehow there are times that we all have to be separated because of migration, jobs and of course with work to other places. But you know how technologies are now a days. Things, such as communication seems just a click away. We would make an effort to say hello among each other.

Through struggles, be it financially, families, love problems, be it faith, school. It brings us closer even more. To the nonsense things to most highly appreciated expensive pleasures. We're all there. The girls are referred to be one of the boys (am proud to be one). And ironically the boys are very sensitive among the ladies, protective in many ways; respect you a hundred per cent. That's just something you rarely find among men. We share our ups and downs. Though we all make fun of each other it never really means to degrade you at some point. They call it trash/street talk. It ranges from disgusting things to topics with much sense. Damn, I consider them genius. I guess things really happen for a reason. We just needed each other. Then you can say the best things in this world are priceless indeed.

Food and drinks are the right ingredients to make a gathering worth remembering. No, we don't or rather we rarely go to bars and dance. But we stay in the corner of the streets and own it. A never ending conversation. I guess that's why there are liquors because its role is to end the night when all are just too drunk to talk. J

We all have our best buddies among us. We never get jealous, we just know a fact that there is also a level of closeness and we respect it. Most of us are single or in a serious relationship. In a relationship status meaning the partner is aware to the attitudes and characters of each one of us. It's NOT required that he/she should hang out always. If there is privacy needed, yeah you guys can have that.

And there is this guy that for a long time been the girls' "frenemy". Though a constant bother and truly an annoying person. Gals and guys find him well, a true friend. The one who will say "you're stupid." But you guys just laugh about it. Well he might have previous relationship that was serious enough to shut us out of his life but then when it ended we were there for him. He once said that to pull him out of a love spell WHEN it would suck him again to stupidity. I don't believe that there is a wrong love but there is a wrong partner and he's a constant magnet to that. And I'm proud to say he's back in his old ways.

The "it girl" is a real treasure. A Goddess …

Who with a right mind to degrade or look down the friends of her partner? When in FACT they were there even before you guys known each other.

Who didn't even make an effort to know his friends? Thinks like a star that couldn't be touch.

Who thinks "I'm too rich to be friends with your level?"

Who talks trash and bad words? Quite a character for a very well brought up girl (?).

Who is oozing with insecurity? Who prevents him from communicating with friends in high school, when she's aware of their closeness?

Who is also your employer for whatever she says you have to do it?

Man, when you're in love you never really seem to see a BITCH in a person. How much mess are you going to put it up with? Love is never like that. It's never insecure. And never fight for wrong reasons. That's just plain LAME.

Don't get too attached my new girl "frenemy", because you admit you're still a school girl. For saying that we don't do something more productive in our pathetic lives, well we've done that. We have licenses to slap you in the face that says we're allowed to just SIT PRETTY the whole day and annoy you. Why don't you just focus in your studies than be bothered with your insecurities?

Yes, we're old enough and please don't lose your respect to us because we know better that your own perspective. I'd rather be old than have your level of understanding.

Your attitude doesn't make you pretty at all. You have to check reality; your friends may be at your side all the time because of your money but not really with your personality.

You have to constantly feed them because they might get hungry, and LEAVE their once called master.

So, if I were you, better start your New Year's resolution NOW.

 

……

 

 

Who are you again?

 

Scramble.Scrambled. Iskrambol.

Whatever is happening right now, is just not right. I've been feeling this pain in my chest and difficulty of breathing for hours. Stress indeed. Don't know where, how to get rid of it.

Have to stir clear with my thoughts. Deep breathing. C'mon you gotta work.

I remember when I was in highschool my papa gave me a bouquet of red roses during my class on a Valentine's day. Thank you so much for your love pa. I'm so proud that you are my papa. I love you so much and I will miss you and your kisses on my forehead.

There is this couple. I really looked up to them. I loved them like they're part of my life. And then after 5 long years they decided to end it up. Nobody really knows the real story behind. It crushed me inside. But their courage is unbelievable. To leave what they used to have behind and move on to another life, is extremely devastating. But hey, if they're not happy anym0re then be it. What comes into my mind now is this, mind your own business. Yeah, i got so attached to them thinking that someday that will be my story. Well, it shouldn't be now that's for sure. As for me, i met the person i want to be with for the rest of my life. Let all those who don't believe in forever be hunters. For me, you have to think of the basics in life. Simplicity isn't hard to achieve same with relationships. Fight if it's really worth fighting for. 'Cause it's when you appreciate each other's existence. It will blossom in silence and just let others notice it. If they say there's more to life than this.. You'll say more will come in God's time. For now, is this. <3

Hi there! I don't want to be bitter. But people please calm down when it comes to speaking up your minds. Yes, yes i kn0w that we want our ideas to be heard. But aren't we have enough of it already in just a day? What would it matter to this world? I know,that there's always an urge to jump and join the rush, but is it en0ugh or even is it important? A world of fast changing technologies..it sounds scary though. I gotta say. Aren't we suppose to keep things in private be in private,and let the public stay in the public.

Under You!

I just need to breathe. With a lot of things going on. I don't know. I can't juggle and stay focus into something ain't coming. I've long waited for it to come but it will only be in my dreams? How sad it is.

Listenin'

Last night I listened to the radio and I got a surprise. I was listening to my old favorite songs. Made me think of the younger years when I was just a teenager having all those funny feelings like infatuations, all those stuffs. <3

I'm happy that I survived that stage. I mean being a teenager was a hell. High school days were chaos. You wanted to belong to a peer or just be left behind.

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