Under You!

I just need to breathe. With a lot of things going on. I don't know. I can't juggle and stay focus into something ain't coming. I've long waited for it to come but it will only be in my dreams? How sad it is.

Listenin'

Last night I listened to the radio and I got a surprise. I was listening to my old favorite songs. Made me think of the younger years when I was just a teenager having all those funny feelings like infatuations, all those stuffs. <3

I'm happy that I survived that stage. I mean being a teenager was a hell. High school days were chaos. You wanted to belong to a peer or just be left behind.

***

WTF!

I had the weirdest dream last night.

In my dream: I was about to sleep when suddenly a long time friend showed up. We haven't seen each other for ages. And there he was. Well I was partly happy and confused. What the hell is he doing in my crib? But I can see he was happy too that he was there.

Then suddenly we were in a different place. It was night time and raining. We're both soak and wet. (Just like you see in movies. Really sounds unrealistic.) And then we're running in the street to find a shed somewhere.

So we're alone in a cold night standing side by side. So many questions ran in my mind. I asked him what is he doing here with me? Where is his girlfriend? We just sat there. And he started talking. He said he left his gf in a hotel in the city after falling to sleep and went looking for me. I felt like my hair grew faster instantly. But there is no way I'd be happy about that. He was just a friend and I have a boyfriend too. So there must be a mistake in this story. I should be with my boyfriend. Hello?

We kissed. Whooooooah! Is this really necessary? I know I love my boyfriend. In my mind: What are we doing? This is crazy. And then finally finally it ended. Yeah it's like now we know we are not really meant for each other. Hey! Thanks for dropping by in my dream fella. haha!



Damn.


Seriously wrong.


But I'm glad I'm back in the real life.

I miss my panini. I'll see you soon.xoxo



kara

Astronaut...

Experiencing the vastness of the outer space. No worries regarding people invading your privacy. Carefreee wiiiiii haha

But a bit lonely. It's just plain simple. Just overlooking what's surrounding you. Peace.....

She's an inspiration.. They're so cute together. They even travel everywhere. How Awesome is that?

Mind in action.

": So what is it you want to say now?
k: nothing.
":Spit it.
k: I have a question.
Why is it at Buyog they don't serve fried buyog?hehe






ka_roocks

3 in the morning...

just droppin by to say i miss doing this...

xoxo to my blog =)

I hope I could still think at this moment. we'll see where this is goin'
*******

Yesterday morning when I woke I checked the time woooaaah wel it was 5:58 a.m.- the past few days were like waking up later than that. So I was amazed. Then went back in forcing myself to absorbed every second that I could help myself to increase my number of sleeping hours but failed again.

How much more now, right?

Why am i depriving myself to sleep? I think 'cause I got used to it. But don't be silly, of course I know it's not that good. If I could improve myself in doin' the right thing? it would destroy the equilibrium of the earth. Such a catastrophe (sigh) heheh

Well well well

Nothin much to say but thanks for checkin out this site...

I forgot there were embarrassing infos written all over but I have nothin to hide

I rarely come visit here because it's time consuming and brain freezing. I'm just a typical pen and paper kind of person. =)

So what have you been up to lately huh?

Just wish you're doin fine...

i miss you

This week is somewhat turning into hell

research exams name it they're all in this week duty too

oh, thanks for telling me those stuffs it's really nice to know what are the things that crosses your mind i really appreciate it

ay el-ow-vi-i way-ow-yu

and always will

XD

il take my zzzzzzzzzzz now




ka_roocks

Foot and Mouth Disease

Those chicks couldn't find their own cats. I don't like to brag about their business but I just can't help it. I won't bite into their wicked plans. Wish I'm dumb enough but I'm not. Get things straight ladies. You can't have what is not meant for you. Just build a bridge and get over it.

The vices that I love to hate. When you're out with friends and leaving me behind drawn in a magical world. I couldn't stop thinking of what's happening. I ought to know those stuffs. I'm part of you (that is if you still remember) . You can't take away my worries.

Yeah maybe I want my share of freedom. Without thinking that maybe you'll be worried too. I hate this. Maybe I wanted to make things fair but it isn't that way always. I have broken myself just like what you told me. But we both learned. We'll take what is now and go on with it.

...

Peace
...........
tonight I'll fall in love all over again with you
.............................................................................
wish you're with me
...................................
tears in my eyes
.............................
just missing you so
................................
--karabianca--

You'll always be a part of me
I'm part of you indefinitely
Boy don't you know you can't escape me
You'll always be a part of me

no i won't beg you to stay

NOtice you noticin me..

lurking in the darkest part of my nestville..there's no way to escape. In flames I'm amazed. The noise I'm hearing I can't obey. When I wanted you to see this, you're afraid. Don't know where to go.

I dream t of the sand along a long stroke of beach line. With blue water keep kissing the luscious white shore. I watched the sunrises above me companied with the white clouds and sky so blue. I waited for it to set. Sitting on the bench under the shade of a tree. Wind keeps reminding me of its presence as the scenario almost took my breath away. Why I wanted to be alone? Peace is securing my safety.

ayyt

lovefool


haha

bianca

Find myself coming back to you

-miss the happenings
-but there are things reminding me of 'em
-difficulties are always at its best
-trying to figure things out
-taking one step at a time
-I can't believe I'd be an object of analysis
-seeing through
-while some just staring at you blankly
-my own story goes blah blah blah
-I am loosing all control
-you're everything I wanted and more
-time is my best friend
-not a fan of sleep
-we're making mends
-how could you heal a broken heart
-thought I couldn't afford to have broken wings and soul too
-guess it's good to be this way
-reminding again I'm alive and kicking
-this wound ain't healing fast enough
-where is the proper management
-AN INSULT TO THE INJURY
-the hills been there ain't going nowhere
-keep missing
-wipe my tears
-touch my face
-look into my sad eyes
-what you've been up to?
-I was thinking of club hoppin'
-can i just have some funnnnn

...........................................
bianca
...........................................

Looking for trouble.
waaaaa why am i not getting enough of him
we went a year of officially being into this sweet having little tampururut moments in our lives
well we never spent it in a very romantic way but from what i have observed
there is this a bit serious and wacky stuff both of us are into more and more while
hanging around with each other (as if we're close physically hahaha)
weeee we're happy that we have each other. i'm glad that he's also into this very much
he's putting us close to his heart.wahahahahaha
those sweet words I'd love hearing from him. He's not tired of telling me though
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

we soooo iiin looooove

:) <3

me and he happeeeee

together

Where you've been for that last few days? Been trying to connect but there is nothing to expect. Same thing goes along. I'm being left alone. Do you still remember me? Keep wondering and hoping you still. Missing things been trying to fill them up. But knowing the fact that it can't be replaced. Blew my face with so much sadness. I can't move. My mind still thinks of us. Unfairly.

nonsense. try listening to Battle by Colbie Caillat. Beautiful song. :)

They told me to get out of the graveyard that I made for myself. The line that most of my friends keep telling about the affair that I'm in. It's a long distance so it's the kind prone to temptations and lies that would eventually lead to broken heart, pain, tears, and some went to the other life.

I give full attention to their concerns for me. They are my friends. I know they won't turn their backs when the earth under my feet shakes. They are scared for me. They worry alot about me.

The reasons: I'm here in my place being a good girl while my boy is living in a far away land. For me, he's doing the good deeds just not to tear my paper heart. Keeping in touch most of the time. And telling things like what he's been up to and the worries. Typical conversations that normal couple have but the absence of each earthly bodies.

The worry: My friends think that he is not exerting effort in our relationship more than I do. Simply they think that I'm the one who's loving more in our situation. Which they think is unfair.

Me: When you love someone does it really matter of who's loving more or less? The moment that I made up my mind about falling inlove is that give my love to someone whom I think never seen the light of day. My mind was telling me to be a saviour perhaps or a challenge for myself . If I'll be able to stand up for my decision long enough. Through all the pain and sufferings. And until now it's right in me. I couldn't get rid of it. 'Cause simply I'm enjoying the game that I'm in. And I have stayed true which I already proved to myself . But why is it I'm not letting this go? When you love, is it the end of everything? Or the beginning of a new chapter? Does it mean it's over when everything seems to be going at the right way? Maybe I wanted more. I couldn't get enough that's why I'm staying.

I know that we are at our best behaviour. Though there are little misunderstandings but eventually get fixed. We are open to suggestions and we talk like best friends. Look, we are not imitating the past we are renovating for the future. And so far so good. Success is still in the process and we are having fun along with it. The unexpected greetings that comes anytime of the day it melts our souls.

Do you think I should be living a life without him? Do you think I'm not happy knowing we have each other? That's why they are asking me to leave.

I know in the end my decision shall prevail. But I'm ready to face the consequences. I have it in my mind. When all else fails, I'll cry and get sad. Who wouldn't?

End

How I wish I could be somehow the very person that anyone would want me to be. But it doesn't work that way. Typically all I know we have our differences. That's all we have and change goes along with it. People act dirty some get hurt and felt the pain. WTF am I thinking? I don't own this world. I shouldn't put in my head "The World According To Me" 'cause I'll get myself into trouble. Maybe I have some things in mind but better yet I'll keep it to myself. And if someone maybe said something that might have offended me in one way or the other. Damn it. I'm the one who asked for it. So I put the blame on me.

Truth hurts and that is that. Deal with reality.

Get things started without even starting it, has been my entire guide for the past weeks in doing my tasks. I'm trying to change things but at the end of the day I find myself the same old me again. I wonder if life just has a hanging point (Why am I wondering when in fact I feel that way.). Weird. So when would be the twists of life come again and make my life a little bit interesting. I find myself thinking of the future right now. And it's a positive one. That's a good sign.

I'm trying to push away this part of my entry 'cause it's too corny but I just can't help myself not to write anything about the other side of the rainbow. It's been two months and twenty days since the last time I was with my guy. And to think about the things we've been through it felt like years. But there is no way we'll be able to see each other again. It'll be in a very long time. I hope we still belong to each other by that time comes. I admit that sometimes I can't assure myself that my bf, who is living at the other side of this world, is being true to me. Likewise, I know that he thinks that way towards me. But I can assure the world I'm being honest in this relationship. Too dramatic. And if you don't trust me I don't care. I have my conscience guiding me and a heart and mind that's telling me to be a loyal gf. And I don't feel I'm having a hard time doing it. In fact I'm enjoying it. But does he? well he tells me that he is.hahaha Anyway, I can say in the end if all this wouldn't end up a happy ever after at least I stayed true. So what?! if I invested a long time in this relationship but I'm happy. That's the important thing.

You can always find tuklodtuklodicream everywhere in the streets of Dipolog. But you'll never find the right one that'll satisfy your tastebuds. I highly recommend the best among the bests. None other than TOM-TOM the favorite flavor of the road. hehehe nonsense.

Cheap but very good. So as with this life we find happiness that value less without lowering the value of ourselves. You only need one thing at a time. I admit I'm not being at my best effort right now but there are things I'm good at. It's just not what you see. But I will never let things easy and spit them out. It's called discovering.

Falling in love.finding peace and happiness where it has been laid below your feet. Yes, within your reach. The obstacles. The pressures. The betrayal. The hatred. Which are execised by some of us. We get hurt and suffered the blame. But the journey doesn't stop there not the way we really thought it would. We miss people and we get sad.But think of what you would feel when you'll be able tof inally find them. Isn't it ironic? laugh along with me. I'm tired of being this. I think change would be a good option. Sigh.
These are all nonsense. Maybe later I'll be able to find my own safe place. Surrounded with great hate butI know I'll be fine. It's good to face fear when you know your safe.

No improvements at all!...unbelievable. wahaha kawawang bata..
I'm not in the mood to write anything right now. I'm so disturbed with many thoughts rushing in my mind and I can't even catch a single one of it.

What a world record! I couldn't believe myself. We had series of quizzes for the prelim term and all of 'em I wasn't able to pass. Am I that dull? Oh I don't know what to do. I am loosing hope and I wanted it to be over. I feel like my knowledge isn't really that tough to be able to stand in this course. But I shouldn't act like this. I wanted to change this. I know there is a light at the end of this dark tunnel. But as of now I'm really lost. Sad to say..

I keep thinking about going back to kindergarten days. Everything are just beauty and play. Easy to be exact. And I guess I can only be in that place in my dreams. But moving forward..I'm sticking to this rough road life and do something about it. I think, it's an easy thing to just say but hard to put in actions. That's me. You guessed it. I don't do physical work. I like it that my mind is working. I hate tasks. I just love to think big or small. Whatever. Nobody gives shit..but I enjoy doing it. And by doing so I find peace and serenity ( sounds familiar?hehehe) .

Oh yeah...I'll rock til I drop.